“The flirting thing.”

“Why do you do it?”

“Do what?”

“The flirting thing.”

“…You know that’s terribly unspecific. I flirt in all sorts of ways, all things do–people, monsters, clams… Though I’m really not sure how clams flirt. I mean, do they bat their shells at one another? I’m confused on how that works. Maybe you have to be a clam to notice it.”

“You’re avoiding the subject.”

“This is the subject.”

“Well you’re dodging the question, then.”

“Why do you flirt, Madam? What makes you bat those long lashes of yours or toss your head, or play with your hair, hmm? What inside you clicks into place in order for you to start trying to attract the person you’re talking to?”

“It… just sort of happens? I’ve been told I’m a very flirty person.”

“But why?”

“Because… Because it’s easy? People like being flattered and complimented, and flirting is a way of stroking someone’s ego. If they think you’re attracted to them, they’ll treat you differently. People just want to be liked, deep down. They want approval and validation and sex. It’s pretty easy to push the right buttons if you know what you’re looking for.”

“And there you have it. That’s why I flirt. Because it’s easier than the truth. I can get anyone to do anything I want if I just flirt right. It’s so much easier, don’t you think? You tip your head, you bat your lashes, you laugh at their jokes, and suddenly they’re all warm putty and simpering smiles, all the while thinking they’re the ones who’ve got you in the palm of their hand.”

“…you sound like an evil genius sometimes, you know that, right?”

“Well, I am an evil genius, sometimes. So I ‘spose it just fits~”


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